I feel that I’m both 0% and 100% foreign, but nothing in between. I have adopted virtually all aspects of the Danish culture, but I still question the Danish understanding of gender equality. Not even Danish feminists appreciate the soft family-oriented values which are traditionally thought of as feminine. They want women to act as men, and I cannot see much equality in that.
In Denmark, the Serbs were pointed out as the bad guys in connection with the wars in the former Yugoslavia. The 9/11 attacks were condemned as a terrible act of terrorism, all while two years earlier the same people had celebrated NATO’s bombing of Serbia, where just as many lives were lost, as a declaration of justice. I found this hypocritical and wanted to get away, so when I finished high school, I moved to Serbia. The first years were alright, but bit by bit I fell back into the same patterns I had struggled with in Denmark. I was looking for love, but ended up in bad relationships, and I think that this was the main reason why I entered the spiritual world. In this world I have practised firewalking to try and overcome my fear, and I have tried to change the thought patterns that I unconsciously lived by. I have finally realised that you need to search for solutions inside yourself, and I think that our society would benefit from more people daring to look inwards rather than pointing the gun at others.
29 years / female / single / psychology student / Hillerød / from Bosnia-Herzegovina / Serbian background / came to Denmark in 1992 / residence permit in 1995