Sunita Haydari

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I think I’m around 50/50. I don’t touch alcohol, I still don’t eat pork, and I don’t wear a headscarf. When I go to parties I wear tightfitting clothes just like the Danish girls. Sometimes I start to doubt, and feel confused about where I belong in society, but I have become used to that now. Regardless of how long I have lived here and have been involved in the Danish society, I have still some identity from the country I come from.

When I meet my cousins, who still live in Iran, I can clearly see the difference between us. With them it is all about being at home, doing the cooking and looking after children. I’m now 20, and can’t cook at all, but I can drive a car and all sorts of things, with the exception of cooking and child minding. I don’t understand the purpose of their lives, just being at home, cooking and taking care of children, what a boring life they must lead. I sometimes feel sorry for them. But I do have something in common with them, because I still pray. I think it is important for the girls from countries with restrictions to use the rights they have here. That they think differently, see things from a new perspective rather than the views they brought with them. If you don’t strive to get an education, and just let others decide for you, I think you have lost out in your life.

20 / high school graduate in 2018 / Sønderborg / from Afghanistan / came to Denmark in 2009 / residence permit in 2011